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Culture Shock

4 Ways Expats Can Feel More at Home

April 28, 2021 by familymoveabroad

There are numerous reasons why people move abroad. Some people opt to become expats because they found a job, while others move because of a relationship, i.e., a boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, or husband. You may be looking forward to the move, excited about a new country, new foods, and culture to sample-until you get there and experience challenges.

Some expats travel to other countries, leaving their families behind. With the current lockdowns due to Covid-19, they are stuck in those countries while their families are in their home countries. You could also be living with your family, but experiencing challenges.

Challenges Experienced by Expats

Loneliness and Homesickness

As an expat in a foreign country and stuck there due to Covid, loneliness has got to be the biggest issue. As much as you may have made friends abroad, it is natural to miss your family, especially when you know you cannot visit them until the lockdowns are lifted. Calling them via video calls is not the same as physical contact, and most people get very lonely and depressed.

Children are significantly affected, especially when they do not understand why Mom or Dad cannot visit or they cannot travel to see them. If you live with the kids in a foreign country, they may feel homesick and miss their old friends and home comforts.

Culture Shock

No matter how well prepared you think you are to live as an expat, culture shock is a reality. Adapting to a whole new way of life is not easy. You have to be prepared for different food, different language, and its nuances, etc. For example, in your home country, something said in jest may be considered highly offensive in your host country.

Language Barrier and Alienation

The language barrier could be an issue, especially if you had not taken the time to learn the language. Everything, including local TV channels, is in that language, and you might resort to relying on interpreters or watching international news online, which further alienates you from the local news. This feeling of alienation, of feeling like you do not belong, is familiar, and it takes a while to get used to it, especially for children.

How to feel more at home

Learn the language

Learning the language of your host country makes the transition more seamless. If you have kids, let them learn the language earlier on before you move. Look for a multilingual school to make the kids feel less isolated and where they can communicate in both their language and the local language.

Install a VPN

Part of making your family feel at home in the new country is watching your favorite TV shows. Most of the shows in your home country might have geo-restrictions in the new country. A VPN allows you to bypass these restrictions, and you can watch the shows as if you were in your home country. The VPN hides your IP address and lets you log into the internet from a remote server. Many expats use VPN to keep up with their favorite shows back home.

Carry your Favorite Things

Make your new home as familiar as possible by taking some of your favorite things. Kids can carry their favorite toys, books or even a favorite blanket. Anything that makes them feel at home.

Go with the Flow

Attitude is the main barrier to getting over culture shock. Prepare yourself and your children for the move. Get familiar with the host country, watch YouTube videos and read about the country. Having a positive attitude goes a long way in helping you settle in faster.

Conclusion

Moving to a new country can be extremely daunting. Feeling isolated and lonely are familiar feelings. You can overcome these hurdles by having a positive attitude and being open to learning new things and making new friends.

Writer’s Bio

Jack is an accomplished cybersecurity expert with years of experience under his belt at TechWarn, a trusted digital agency to world-class cybersecurity companies. A passionate digital safety advocate himself, Jack frequently contributes to tech blogs and digital media sharing expert insights on cybersecurity and privacy tools.

Filed Under: Culture Shock, Expat Family Life, Expat Tips

Your Child’s Move Abroad: 5 Factors Affecting How They Cope

April 25, 2019 by familymoveabroad

Just as with adults, children moving abroad experience a sense of loss and period of adjustment. Loosely termed culture shock, each child or teen’s adaptation process will be unique to them. Understanding the variables that play a role in this transition can help you set your family up for success. Here are five factors affecting your child’s adjustment after moving to a new country.

1. Age of Children when Moving Abroad

Generally speaking, the older the child at the time of the move, the more challenges they’re likely to experience.

Children under age 4 will have the easiest time adapting to a new language, cultural traditions, foods and weather. Their lives are still largely anchored within the home. In fact, if the child hasn’t transitioned to a school setting yet, the shock will likely be minimal. Further, the social life of a younger child is far less established than that of an older one. Yes, children this age have friends, even “best” friends. But their friendships are anchored more in play rather than the emotional bonds formed between children from age 5 to 11. These kids are also more likely to have daily routines and relationships independent from the family unit. Moving children abroad takes them away from all the friends, activities and achievements they associate with home.

As you might guess, an international move can be a much harder process during adolescence. Teens lives are anchored in their social world. Forming connections to people as well as exploring interests are the means by which they build their emerging sense of identity. Differences in musical tastes, fashion styles and what’s considered “fun” will leave them nostalgic for friends, sports and hobbies left behind.

2. Personality Style and Personal Strengths

Personality traits such as sociability, emotional sensitivity and level of activity also influence how a child adapts after moving.

Outgoing children with well developed social skills are more likely to make friends in their new cultural setting. However, such children may also suffer more frustration if they do face troubles in this regard. Why? Because it runs counter to their previous success relating to people.

Family Adventures

Not surprisingly, shy children are more susceptible to the social withdrawal risks of culture shock. Yet ironically, sometimes moving shy children to a completely new environment allows them thrive. They open up in a way they were never able to do before, and experiencing a level of friendship and belonging they didn’t have previously.

Emotional tendencies also impact how a child manages culture shock. The reality is that some children are just wired to be more resilient. They’ll adapt more easily compared to children who innately don’t cope well with change.

Kids who tend towards positive thinking and who manage emotions well will also fare better than kids who tend towards negative thinking or who struggle with emotions like fear and anger. Even energy levels play a role in a child’s adaptation process. More active kids, generally speaking, integrate new stimuli more rapidly compared to their less active peers, supporting acceptance of the changes in their environment.

3. The Reasons for Moving Abroad

The reasons causing you to move greatly affect children’s receptivity to their new circumstances, regardless of age or other personality traits.

Children from families moving abroad for an improved quality of life — better schools for the kids or job opportunities for the parents — will experience less difficulties than those whose families are moving to escape a dangerous, insecure or stressful situation. Similarly, children from families looking to experience a family adventure abroad will have an easier time of it. In general, the greater the child’s perception of security, stability and reward, the less challenges the child will have.

Teens Moving Abroad Must Find New Peer Groups

4. Participation in Decision-Making

Allowing children some input into moving related decisions will support their transition. This will be especially true for adolescents. Having some say in matters that affect them will support their burgeoning autonomy and foster a sense of control and security.

Of course, the parents need to make key decisions that are beyond a child or teen’s understanding. But, where possible, allowing your child to participate in the decision making process will support their receptivity to the changes in their life. Listen to their opinions about homes you’re considering. If they’re old enough, allow them to tour schools with you and take in their feedback. Which one do they think would be better for them? This kind of collaboration might even instill some excitement about their move abroad.

Along these lines, try to preview as much as possible in advance. If you’ve already found a home, show them photos. Virtually walk the streets of your new neighborhood using Google maps. Introduce some of the new foods awaiting them before you arrive. Upping their knowledge of what’s to come will lessen intensity of the changes in store.

5. Family Make Up and Parenting Style

A child from a multicultural family will more readily adapt to cultural differences. Having been exposed to more than one culture within their home environment, these children intuitively understand different cultures do things differently. They also may have traveled more internationally and might already be exposed to more than one language. These circumstances make them more flexible to the changes brought on by an international move.

Parenting style also plays a significant impact on a child’s transition to a new country. Children from families with rigid rule setting that limits a child’s autonomy and expression of feelings will have a more difficult time compared to kids from more families with more flexible family dynamics. The parents are always the leaders, but children in this setting are encouraged to express their needs and desires. They’re also encouraged to explore their autonomy. The safety of their family unit permits them to freely feel and process the insecurities and emotions that arise from their new life situation.

What These Variables Mean for Your Family Move Abroad

In one way or another, these five factors play a role in how easily a child adapts after moving to a foreign country. Yet there are no hard and fast rules that will dictate what happens. Hopefully, understanding these elements will help you support your children’s needs.

Think of your child as a brain that needs trust, a heart that needs love and a soul that needs peace. It’s completely normal, as a parent, to fear witnessing your children struggle. But worrying about moving abroad won’t help. You only need to be there, sharing your own perceptions, normalizing the strangeness by talking about difficult situations openly and without fear.

Remember, confronting these kinds of challenges is part of what makes moving to a foreign country such an opportunity for growth. It opens the door for a child — or person of any age for that matter — to discover strengths, abilities and qualities within themselves they would never have the chance to see or develop. And that is a gift that last a lifetime.

Have you observed any of these factors in play when you moved your family to a foreign country? If you’re still in the planning stages of moving your children abroad, do you have particular concerns about how some of these variables will affect your child? Share your comments with me here.

Irene Paola Garza del Valle

Irene Paola Garza Del Valle ~ Integrative Psychotherapy ~ Specializing in expats and multicultural couples and families

Born and raised in Mexico, I now live in Seville, Spain. I have counseled people from 11 countries and 5 continents both in person and virtually. Visit me at
mentesequilibrio.wixsite.com/mentesenequilibrio ~ www.facebook.com/mentesenequilibrio ~ www.youtube.com/channel/UCYZuuVPNlY3BjICCiyPplmA

Filed Under: Culture Shock, Expat Family Life, Expat Tips Tagged With: Culture Shock in Children, Expat Parenting, How to Cope with Culture Shock, How to deal with Culture Shock, Parenting Abroad

20 Culture Shock Symptoms Every Expat Should Know

March 3, 2019 by familymoveabroad

Culture shock affects every expat at some point. Even if your move abroad is purely out of desire. Preparedness is key. Recognizing the emotional, social and physical symptoms of culture shock — along with tools to cope — will ease your transition and set you up for success in your new foreign home. Emotional symptoms of culture shock make it hard to cope

Emotional Symptoms of Culture Shock

  1. Feelings of nostalgia and sadness for your country of origin. Missing family, friends and activities you used to do.
  2. Loneliness, isolation and a sense of “not belonging” in your new country.
  3. Feelings of doubt, disappointment, guilt or regret at the challenges of living abroad.
  4. Constant thoughts of wanting to go back to your home country.  
  5. Fear, anxiety and nervousness when facing the unknown.
  6. Inability to be present. To enjoy new situations and new experiences.
  7. Feeling negative about the future.
  8. Constant comparison of the lifestyle and circumstances between your home country and your new country.

Physical symptoms of Culture Shock

Culture shock may manifest itself through physical symptoms

  1. Loss of energy, physical tiredness, fatigue.
  2. Change in sleep patterns — insomnia, narcolepsy, nightmares.  
  3. Shift in eating habits — eating disorders, eating in excess or loss of appetite.
  4. Pain in one or several parts of the body with no obvious physical cause.
  5. Hair loss or skin ailments.
  6. Gastrointestinal disorders.
  7. Development of new allergies

Social symptoms of Culture Shock

  1. Difficulty communicating due to a language barrier.Culture shock can make you feel isolated and alone
  2. Challenges making friends and getting to know people.
  3. Emergence or increased shyness and insecurity in social settings and interpersonal encounters.
  4. Inability to understand cultural and social differences.
  5. Difficulties integrating that result in further loneliness and isolation

How These Symptoms Might Appear in Everyday Life

Clearly culture shock affects multiple areas of your well being. Further, challenges in one area may interact and amplify difficulties in others. 
    • You miss friends, family and activities you used to do before you moved.
    • That sadness keeps you from exploring activities in your new country.
    • Failure to engage in enjoyable pastimes makes it difficult to form new friendships.
    • The lack of friends starts to isolate you socially.
    • This isolation feeds your sense of loneliness and feeling like “you don’t belong here.”
    • Inner turmoil increases, keeping you awake at night.
    • Your increasing fatigue aggravates your nervousness, causing appetite loss.
    • The stress on your body diminishes energy further.
    • This physical depletion makes you less able to invest yourself socially.
    • Loneliness increases even more.
    • You become even more convinced “you don’t belong here.” 
  • You obsess even more about the life you had before your move.

Tools to Help You Cope

Clearly, culture shock can be painfully intense. And serious. Untreated, symptoms can degrade into depression, anxiety or other health problems. Of course, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t move abroad! The opportunities for self-discovery that comes from living in a foreign country are truly one of a kind. The important thing to remember is these kinds of symptoms are a completely normal part of your adaptation process. It’s when they persist that they become a problem.  Preparedness is key. Even before you move,  there are many things you can to do cope with culture shock.  With awareness — and perhaps a bit of professional help — culture shock will be nothing more than a temporary component of a fantastic foreign adventure.
Irene Paola Garza Del Valle ~ Integrative Psychotherapy ~ Specializing in expats and multicultural couples and families
Born and raised in Mexico, I now live in Seville, Spain. I have counseled people from 11 countries and 5 continents both in person and virtually.

mentesequilibrio.wixsite.com/mentesenequilibrio ~ www.facebook.com/mentesenequilibrio ~ www.youtube.com/channel/UCYZuuVPNlY3BjICCiyPplmA

Filed Under: Culture Shock, Expat Family Life, Expat Tips Tagged With: Can you overcome culture shock, How culture shock effects, How does culture shock affect an individual, How to handle culture shock, Symptoms of Culture Shock, What does culture shock feel like, What is Culture Shock

How to Cope with Culture Shock – An Expert’s Guide

February 18, 2019 by familymoveabroad

When culture shock takes hold, the word can feel like a lonely place

Moving to a foreign country may be one of the greatest adventures you ever pursue. Yet the excitement and planning of your international adventure can mask a much darker side of your move abroad — the emotional toll of culture shock.

What is culture shock and why does it occur?

Culture shock refers to the confusion and distress you feel when you’re suddenly exposed to a new, strange, or foreign culture. It further encompasses the feelings of loss and grief for the people, places and activities you love and miss from the culture left behind.

Who experiences culture shock and how does it affect you?

All expats eventually feel sadness over losing the life they had before — even if the move abroad was very much desired.

Specific symptoms may present themselves emotionally, socially and physically. Your individual experience of these symptoms will be unique and specific to you.

Personality differences, life history and the circumstances behind your move all play a role in your transition process.

What can you do to overcome culture shock?

Successful adaptation demands you process the loss you’re experiencing before it degrades to anxiety, depression or other mental health problems.

Balance is key. The aim is not to detach from your former culture, nor forget about loved ones and favorite places you’ve left behind. Rather, you integrate who you were before with the new you opened up by your foreign experiences.

Express your emotions

Talking about the negative emotions you’re experiencing is key to releasing them. Express everything you are feeling — the nostalgia, the sadness, the disappointment and the fear.

If relying on a friend or family member makes you feel too vulnerable, seek out a qualified therapist.

The loneliness of culture shock can isolate you socially

Get to know new people

Developing relationships in your new country is critical. Find ways to pursue activities you enjoyed in your former life to start cultivating new social circles.

Consider seeking out expat communities in your area. Connecting with others from your home country might make you feel less alone, and those individuals will likely understand what you’re going through.

Create a positive outlook

When feeling down, try to remember your strengths and the reasons you made the decision to move abroad.

Focus on the benefits of your new place of residence — the things you can do in your new country that you maybe can’t at home. Look for similarities between the old life and the new so that you’re not obsessing about the differences.

Turn uniqueness into opportunity

Sometimes being a foreigner has its advantages. Is there a skill you have that might open up a job opportunity? A business idea you can bring from your home culture that locals might be interested in?

Finding ways to offer something to your new community will help you feel better about being there and open doors to new personal connections.

Focus on the present

Invest your time and thoughts into making a life in the place where you are now. It’s one thing to acknowledge what you love and miss about your home country. It’s another to obsess over what you no longer have.

Pursue the sports and recreational activities you enjoyed before. Enroll in a gym. Go for a run. Create a routine for yourself.

Blend the things that make you “you,” while mixing in a few cultural events or opportunities unique to your new home.

Culture shock symptoms and tips how to cope.

Remember all your experiences add up in life

A foreign relocation is a huge step outside your comfort zone. Stepping out of your comfort zone is an opportunity to grow. Living in a foreign country presents many opportunities to learn something new, to expand your perspective about life, to see the world through new eyes.

The emotions you’re experiencing are an opportunity for you to realize you are stronger, more resilient and more capable than you thought you were. Learn to reframe hardships into learning experiences. Shifting perspectives will help you take pride in yourself for what you’re accomplishing.

Prevention

Culture shock can’t necessarily be avoided, but you can prepare yourself and your family members for the potential sadness to come. Consciously being clear with yourself about you’re leaving behind before you actually leave will help you more quickly process the loss and accept the new situation.

Create realistic expectations about what you expect to do in your new country. Think about things that will be different that you expect to enjoy, but also take time to note the things you know you’ll miss.

Family, friends, favorite foods, hobbies or sports that won’t be available… Often just the awareness of the sadness and symptoms of culture shock is enough to help ease through the changes.

Do any of your family members already struggle with mental health issues like depression or anxiety? Find a counselor immediately on arrival, or even consider starting therapy before you go. The whole journey will feel that much more supported.

When to seek professional support

The experience of some or all of the symptoms of cultural adaption at some point in your transition is completely normal. But grief from culture shock left untreated can lead to more severe emotional states such as depression or anxiety.

If you find yourself with increasingly worsening symptoms that persist for more than two months, you should seek out help. A qualified therapist will work with you to create solutions and strategies to deal with your feelings and come to a place of acceptance and happiness in your new life.

Expat and Psychologist Irene Paola Garza Del Valle understands culture shock personally and professionally.

Irene Paola Garza Del Valle ~ Integrative Psychotherapy ~ Specializing in expats and multicultural couples and families.

Born and raised in Mexico and now living in Seville, Spain, I have counseled people from 11 countries and 5 continents both in person and virtually. I want people to know you will stop feeling afraid when you realize the answers lie inside you. It doesn’t matter where you are living or where you are from. Your home, your safe place, is yourself.

 Get in touch with Irene at mentesequilibrio.wixsite.com/mentesenequilibrio ~ www.facebook.com/mentesenequilibrio ~ www.youtube.com/channel/UCYZuuVPNlY3BjICCiyPplmA

 

 

Filed Under: Culture Shock, Expat Family Life, Expat Tips Tagged With: Culture Shock Help, Effects of Culture Shock, How to Cope with Culture Shock, What is Culture Shock, Why does culture shock happen

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